Oct 21 2014

Power and Wisdom 04

Published by kaya singer under Podcasts

Hands cupped holding a big heart. My original hand painted illustration.

Todays show is about Power and Wisdom and how the balance of these two energies are so important in growing your business and you becoming the real visionary leader you are meant to be.  

We’ll look at how these energies shift and change through women’s cycles. Both power and wisdom mean something different to a 30 year entrepreneur than they do to a 65 year old.

The show ends with some very poignant questions that will get you thinking more deeply about where you are now and where you want to be.

If you liked this show please subscribe on i Tunes and give a 5 star rating. We appreciate  your comments too. 

Welcome to the next Episode  of Business the Wise Woman Way by Kaya Singer, your host.

Today’s show is about Power and Wisdom

A great topic and so important for all you women entrepreneurs regardless of what stage you are in or how much you might be struggling.

I’ve talked a lot about the importance of being authentic- and  in this episode all women will benefit as its about having the courage to be yourself and how that will influence your marketing and your branding but most importantly  your ability stand in a place no one else can stand.

Im often asked about my story  especially from people who noticed that my branding changed in the last year or two.

Early on in my business I didn’t get what I’m going to be sharing with you today. I tried to be someone I wasn’t and as a result I had what I call, a beige message.

I didn’t stand out. I had to really dig deep inside and figure out what I was hiding or what I was hiding from. Not fun.

I guess I thought I had to look like what I thought a business woman looked like and it so wasn’t me!  I’m a mother earth goddess type, artsy, and free spirited. I thought no one would be attracted to that.

And more recently I had to really look in the mirror and accept that my hair is no longer long and dark.  It is silver now and for a long time that meant- old. Ugh. If I couldn’t accept this about myself, why would anyone else? And how do you think this might have affected my marketing and really my whole business?

In an effort to step into being more fully who I have become in the last few years, I searched for a word, the word to describe this new life stage where  I’ve landed and then be able to own this as being a powerful time of life.

You might wonder why I’m  doing this. Why not just be it and let go of describing it.  I have to do it! Not just for myself, but for all women of all ages. I’ve stood up and supported  women to be empowered and successful for over forty years.  It’s a part of my mission!

But its also for me and accepting myself as who I am not and realizing that this is actually what makes me attractive. I didn’t get it at  first but keep listening and I will be explaining why.

You might be thinking, why just women? Why not men?  I love men, but they have very different issues!  

For us women, we have lived with our fertility cycles for our whole adult life. That impacted my business decisions from a being young and saucy chick, to being a beautiful, but over-worked mother, to going through menopause and feeling like quitting, to ending up in the wise woman time of life and realizing I’ve  arrived!

Through all these stages, my path was one of an entrepreneur, and the way I ran my businesses were affected by who I was! Why? Because I never had the kind of business where people didn’t know me.  People did business with me because it was me.

I didn’t hide out in a back room while my employees ran the show. People come to me for the help I could give them. I know its the same for all of you. Its about you; your values, the way you show up and your culture. Plus my energy and focus was affected  too. Trying to run a business while raising a toddler is way different than when I was 26 and no children. 

Another thing- As women, we learn early on that we are supposed to look and be beautiful and sexy!  Smart and successful are good, but it helps to be hot as well! Sarah Palin showed us that. Hilary was criticized for looking too…powerful. What can I say!

I knew all this at age 13!  I looked at 60 year old women and saw them as “old” which wasn’t a positive adjective. They were lovely grandmas but doing something meaningful in the world? No. Those models didn’t exist for me. Zero. 

Our society still enshrines youth, and the beauty that comes with it, especially in regards to women. There is a bias toward youth in general, thinking that you will be less innovative, less cutting edge as you age.

This is exactly where I’m challenging these deep seated attitudes! Here is a bit of my own story to illustrate my point.

When I was in my 20’s I decided I would be different when I was 60. I would still be working at a career I loved and making a difference. I wouldn’t be “old!”  I thought old was a state of mind. In truth, I refused to see myself there. In my youthfulness, I  had a way of not seeing what I didn’t want to become.

I remember hearing Barbara Marx Hubbard ( an amazing women)  speak about 25 years ago. She must have been about 60 then. She said, “I have more energy now then I have ever had, at a time when the world tells me I am supposed to be slowing down!” I smiled and wanted to be just like her!

However, when I hit 50 I was grossly unprepared for suddenly being invisible, to not just men, but also women! Not being fertile anymore affects way more than one’s ability to have children. I was in grief and  attached to my young, sexy body and then I questioned my ability to offer anything else that would be meaningful again in this lifetime.

In a way I bought in to the very same attitudes I was criticizing. I had no idea who I was anymore.

Yesterday, I looked up the word “Crone” in the thesaurus and was shocked by the list of words I saw on the page:  witch, shrew. bitch, beast, old woman, battle-axe, biddy, fury, nag, hagfish, offensive old bag, slut, sorceress…

I thought a Crone was a female elder who held great wisdom and inner sight.  How did those definitions get changed and how does that contribute to disempowering women when they are actually in the height of their power? Yes- the reason the term Wise Woman is often attributed to elder women is because of all the accumulated life experience and the insight that emerges from those years.

I was recently at a gathering of 60+ women.  I looked around our circle and I could feel the deep wisdom each person carried.

Here is the truth. Yes, the 50s can be a bit hard as you go through a deep metamorphosis. But this is all about opening a conduit to POWER. It’s about preparing your body and spirit to do it’s real work in your 60s and beyond. Not only did that power emerge for me  but also an innate wisdom, inner sight and channel that I didn’t have in this way before.

I was always intuitive, but now it’s been super-magnified. As a result, I can help people in ways of much deeper wisdom. I have had to wake-up to that gift and own it.

It’s no longer about just being sexy, and that can be hard as we are trained to use that kind of energy in our marketing.  So are you seeing why I needed to say exactly who I am.

So, here is my challenge to you.

Regardless of what number age you are, you will eventually become  60, 70, and 80, so it’s about beginning right now, wherever you are, whether you are 30 or 40- to accept your authentic self and stand tall in it. 

I am a champion for all women, regardless of your age. Develop the habit of not hiding your real truth and instead look for what it is that makes you truly unique.

What do you offer in your business that only you can give? It means really searching deep in your psyche to unearth this truth about yourself.

Whether you’re a coach, healer, designer, or educator, it’s not all about the skills of your profession and your training in whatever field you are in.  It’s also about you- about who you are and what you bring that is your expression, and no  one else’s.

This was hard for me to get my head around because I was still thinking I needed to look smart and I tried to copy what other successful people were doing.

The problem with that is those people were being authentically themselves (at least some were).  They were standing in their own expression. I couldn’t be them even if if I wanted to.

If you are a younger woman in business, you have an advantage of having not as much life experience yet! You have that freshness and cutting edge that is captivating.

This means your trunk isn’t as cluttered with stuff! You are still developing who you really are so you have the gift of being able to experiment as you stand in your power. Your biggest challenge is to get past self-doubt, which seems to be the strongest at your stage. That self-doubt is like water on the fire of Power.

The older we get the less self-doubt we have. That self-doubt can eat up your power in moments.

I began my fist business when I was 26 and I felt I was invincible and could do anything. I made pottery and lugged around heavy crates of stoneware, and I knew I had my whole life ahead of me. I ended up quitting that business when I hurt my back. Who knew!

Before I turned 60 I had started three businesses and the learning from each one morphed into the next one. So- nothing is ever lost. We just keep getting clearer about our life purpose.

I talk to many women who are searching for that allusive life purpose and are in agony because they don’t know what it is.  I tell people- just be yourself and follow what feels right now. It will eventually turn into the next thing. Its like being in a canoe and going down a windy river. You can’t see whats past the next turn and you need to be in the moment 100% or the boat will capsize!

So many women begin a new business during their wise woman years. Their business is based on their real purpose, passion, and life contribution and this includes all the wisdom from the past 40  years and the amazing insight and power that only comes later.

I had to realize I had this wisdom and once I did that I  could see the thread of how everything I had done was making me who I am right now. It could be your time to create a legacy.

Inner beauty becomes the new benchmark and this requires no make-up to cover up wrinkles! It’s all about what’s on the inside. I love supporting all women to really go for it and use their power for fueling their entrepreneurial success!

You are actually tapped into to an energy source that’s bigger than you an imagine, however you need to choose to turn on the switch!

What about the outer beauty once you get older?  Of course at age 67 I still have outer beauty and if you are a 30  year old woman you also have wisdom. We both have both!  There is an overlap. But just like I no longer have the sexy, hot look of a 30 year old. Most 30 year olds lack the wisdom and power of a woman who has tapped into that power source at age 60.

I challenge you to look at your own attitudes about yourself and your power and wisdom. How much of it is affected by your age?

You don’t have to wait until you are 60 to own this power and wisdom.

You can begin the process now by embracing yourself, whoever you are and whatever age you are, by allowing your wisdom to come through in whatever form it is. It’s about  stepping fully into life and not hiding!

If you have own your own business, what better opportunity to express this with your total being.

In what ways are you holding yourself back from stepping in more fully?

In what ways do you hide yourself?

How are you holding on to something you need to let go of?

How do these things affect your ability to stand taller as a leader of your business?

Be the first to add your comments

Oct 15 2014

5 Ways to Get Un-Stuck at Being a Technician?

Published by kaya singer under Business Success

inspiredI’m sure you had fantasies of growing a six-figure business in a short time. 

You know it’s possible and so many people say they’ve done it and promise to show you how.

So, with excitement you began your business and now some years later you are still stuck at $30,000 a year or even $60,000 a year and you don’t know what went wrong!

Or you are ashamed to admit that you are only  at $20,000 a year.

You are working long hours and doing your thing, whether it’s healing work,  writing, coaching, designing, or some other focus that takes all of your time.

You do everything yourself because  (a) you don’t have the money to hire people or (b) you don’t know how to let go of what only you can do. 

There are times you feel like one of those hamsters with their  wheel going around and around. 

You have the mindset of a technician; someone who does the work, whatever it is.

Technicians work on the cars in a shop. If it a successful business, the owner never gets her hands dirty ever again. 

The owner is the visionary entrepreneur and has the overview, plans for business growth, watches the bank balance,  and makes strategic decisions.

The owner has a clear vision of where the business is going and has goals and a path laid out to get there. 

Do  you have a clear vision of where your business is going and what needs to happen to manifest that vision?

If you are a technician you probably don’t have time or know how to create this picture. You might not be wearing the entrepreneurial hat. 

map

Here are 5 super-empowering things you can do if you want to switch hats.  As you do these things, it will be like looking in the mirror and not just seeing the new hat, but also a new attitude on your face!  

Warning: These things require you to shift and step out of your coveralls!

1.  Take yourself on a business retreat. It could be a weekend away to the beach or mountains.  Or it could be someplace inspiring right in your town. The main thing is to shift to a different mental space. You are going to have a visionary meeting with your business, so don’t combine this with visiting friends or a shopping trip. Get out of your house!

2. Tell at least three people you trust. Pick people who will be supportive and ideally are people you would see as mentors. Ask them if you can contact them for a 15 minute phone or skype call while you are away.  Ask them if you can share with them and ask them for quick feedback if you get stuck or unsure.

If they don’t have time or not interested, ask someone else. Offer to do something for them in return or offer to pay them if you feel that would be appropriate.  These people will be your visioning team. 

3. Get some good quality marketing pens – at least 12 colors and some large sheets of paper. You don’t have to be an artist so don’t freak out. This is isn’t going to be an art project. It is an information gathering session and  using markers and color will help you to connect more with your ideas. It moves from being just a mental exercise to being emotional and intuitive as well. 

4. While you are in your retreat answer these questions.  
•  Who am I?
•  Whats my mission and why is that important?
•  What’s working in my business?
•  What is not working?
•  What needs to change or grow in order to make it work?
•  What is the inner or outer obstacle?
•  What is my money goal ?
•  What needs to happen to get there?
•  What kind of help or support do I need?
•  What are the next steps?

5. With your paper and markers show each question and every answer or response you can imagine. using colors, arrows, large and small words, faces, hearts, or whatever.  Remember, this isn’t art. It is just a visual map of your ideas going forward.  There are no mistakes. 

When its all done, stand back and look at it. Notice how you feel. You’ve just stepped out of technician role and stepped into the role of the visionary entrepreneur. 

Remember, its not about getting a right answer. It is a process and every time you do it, you become clearer. 

helpAre you willing?  I know you can do this!  However if you want support and someone to walk the path with  you, contact me for a free strategy phone session to help you get going. 

Ask me questions in the comment section below. I promise to answer.

oh- and here is what I did recently- I created my own map with  only 12 markers. Have a look!

Be the first to add your comments

Oct 14 2014

Flora Bowley- Painting and Teaching the Intuitive Way 03

Published by kaya singer under Podcasts

FB_bio_new_2014

Please join us with Flora Bowely, Internationally celebrated painter, workshop facilitator, author, and inspirationalist.  

Flora’s story is captivating for any creative woman who wonders how to build a successful business while not sacrificing your passion and real creative purpose.

You also don’t have to be an artist to benefit from Flora’s wisdom. 

Flora Bowley is an internationally celebrated painter, workshop facilitator, top-selling author, and inspirationalist. 

Her vibrant paintings can be found in numerous galleries, in public spaces, on album covers and on a variety of unique licensed products found around the world.  

Flora splits her time between painting, teaching, and writing.   To find out more about Flora’s art, book, online courses and workshops, please visit www.florabowley.com.

In this captivating interview Flora shares how she began her career by just following her heart, thinking that all she truly wanted was to be a successful painter. She was surprised to discover how much she loved working with people,  teaching and helping others to follow their passion and bring creativity into their own lives. She shares her story and it’s filled with so much positive energy and great advice! 

Please subscribe on iTune and leave a review. We so appreciate it. 

Add your comments - 3 so far

Oct 08 2014

Your Yellow Brick Road

Published by kaya singer under Business Success,Clear Your Focus,Marketing,Money Map

yeloow

 

Do you ever feel like this guy in the picture? 
You know there is a path to follow, you even know some of the steps, but it’s so hard!!

You really want the pot of gold at the end but the process to get from here to there is scary!

There so many monsters to get past, issues to face, and difficulties to overcome. It makes you unconsciously choose to stay where it’s safe.

It’s overwhelming to engage with all those emotions and still make progress.

I went to a networking mixer group recently. The kind where people mix around with drink in hand. I know you’ve heard me talk about networking groups and how I don’t enjoy them.

The introvert part of me just wants to stay home. All the small talk wears me out. I was the presenter though, so it was worth it to go, of course. My introvert doesn’t have a problem with being on stage and holding the mic. Funny how that works:)

But what I noticed was that there were a lot of bored looking people there. I had the feeling they were there because they knew it was important to take action and take steps to get more clients, be more visible, and meet people. 

Some people didn’t seem bored. They were animated, laughing a lot, and generally more present. Being there was the right step for them. They were in their comfort zone. 

For the bored group, this might not have been the best step forward. If I wasn’t on stage I would have looked like one of them! This is the reason I quit going to those kind of mixer groups. 

Every business has it’s own yellow brick road and the steps are not the same for each of us. This was a big aha for me and one of my awarenesses that helped me get closer to that pot of gold. 

Your own plan needs to take into account:

•  What you enjoy doing and what lights you up.
•  What you are naturally good at.
•  What will give you the most return on your investment of time and energy.
•  What you need to do and how to get support so it’s not so scary.
• An understanding of how each step leads to the next one. There is a pattern. 

Imagine you wanted to have a few friends over for a dinner party. You can visualize the lovely meal on the table and you beaming with pleasure as they all take their first bite.

However, you’ve never done this before and you worry you will mess up, burn the roast or over-cook the veggies. 
That fear could stop you, or you might plan really well. Make sure you have all the ingredients, utensils in the right location, recipes, time blocked out, etc. You might even get a friend to help.

Do you have a plan with all the steps to take to get to your business pot of gold? 

If not you will  either stay where it’s safe or you will freeze at first sign of a monster. 

How do I know this?  Well- that was me, in fear and overwhelm and it kept me stuck for too many years. I finally have that clear plan; my yellow brick road to success.

Your plan becomes your new safety. As long as  you follow it and get help when needed, you’ll get there. 

Here is an easy and super low cost way to get your own plan.  Wise Woman Map!
http://www.awakeningbusiness.com/wise-woman-map/

What are you waiting for?  I offer a totally FREE strategy session. If you’ve never had one, contact me. 

 

Be the first to add your comments

Oct 07 2014

5 Ways to Shift to a Bigger Business Mindset 02

Published by kaya singer under Podcasts

FeaturePics-Mountain-Biking-Silhouette-111238-1103307

How are you keeping yourself small in yourself and your business?

We’ll be looking at this question and the things that keep women stuck in a place of being smaller than they want to be. 

I will be offering 5 things that you can do right now that will allow you to shift your mindset to a place where you are not just earning more money, but feeling more empowered as you re-write your own story and watch your mindset gradually transform.

If you liked this show please subscribe on i Tunes and give a 5 star rating. We appreciate your comments too. 

 

Welcome to the next episode of “Business the Wise Woman Way.”

I’m Kaya Singer and today’s topic is  ” 5 Ways to Shift to a Bigger Business Mindset”

How are you keeping yourself small?

There’s a lot of marketing hype out there about how to make six or seven figure incomes from your business and people promising you huge results overnight!

I’ve also been guilty of looking for an easy way to get there. Looking for overnight magic is not wrong or bad but for me it reflected  part of growing up with fairy tales where the princess always got saved by the prince and she never had to work.

I admit that I was raised that way- to think that I would find a husband who would support me and I wouldn’t have to work hard at anything.

That was the picture that was given to most women of my generation and it slammed right into the womens liberation messages I got later when I was in college. We were told we could be and do anything we wanted, to be independent and strong, but we weren’t given the instruction manual and the steps. No one had those steps. It had to begin with the feeling or mindset.

I still remember a group of us young women driving to a nearby city to hear Gloria Steinem speak, and on the way there we got a flat tire. None of knew how to change it or even wanted to get our hands and clothes dirty. We laughed because we were supposed to be liberated and not need men but we flagged down some nice man who looked at our cute 20 year old faces and he gladly changed the tire because he saw us as helpless girls.The prince rescuing the princesses in the forest!   We didn’t try to correct him.  it was such a confusing time.

We laughed all the way there after the tire was fixed about how how we all wanted our cake and eat it too.  I think now, 40 years later, we are all still trying to figure it out. Of course now that I am 40 years older I know that it’s fine to have my husband do those types of jobs and I manage the money! Hope you are seeing the irony.

Some women ended up with corporate jobs and felt like that they had arrived to only find out that they were looked at as fancy secretaries or at the best lower management. Men, in those days, weren’t comfortable working with them as an equal.

But I was one of those of us who chose self-employment by default. I couldn’t bear the thought of working for someone else. I wanted to be free and creative!  I thought this would be the easy way to support myself. I did just enough work to do just that.  I didn’t care about money enough to work harder.  In truth I didn’t even realize I had a business.

For one thing no one ever told me I could own a business. At that time I saw very few women as a successful business owners. And my inner mindset still wasn’t focused on money.

That changed 25 years later when I was almost 50 and realized I needed real money to do the things I wanted to do and then I got sucked into those hypey  marketing messages more than once, the ones that promised me instant wealth if I followed their system. I tried MLM thinking this was the way. I wanted a magic wand.

In fact some of those systems do work but only if you work!  I’m reminded of those old wind up toys we used to play with. It required you to turn the crank and then it would  do amazing things.

The toy comes with all the mechanisms to work. You are similar.

You have huge potential but you have to keep yourself cranked up.

First you have to recognize you have all the ability, but it requires you to slog through and face all your demons one at a time. My demons were my old money  issues,  not thinking I was smart enough,  and just not wanting to work so hard.

I had a challenging time at first, as I pushed through all of these issues in order to get to the core place that said- you have to do this and you can do this!

I had to shift my mindset at the deepest levels to realize that I was plenty smart and that in fact, it wouldn’t be overnight, I had too much “stuff’ to deal with; money issues, self-esteem, the whole enchilada. But  I knew I  could learn how to navigate the world of money. It was just a mental block that was keeping me small.

Just like recovering alcoholics are the best addiction counselors, in many ways I am now such an expert at helping women who are stuck like I was. I can recognize the signs in a moment! Maybe you have a similar story.

I kept my business small so I didn’t go over that fear line. It was small enough that I felt able to manage it. However I didn’t know that at first.  I kept saying I wanted to be bigger, 6 figures etc. but it was a lie really. I wanted the money without doing the work or facing my fears,  When I woke up and realized this is what I was doing, it was painful and it meant making decisions from a whole different place. I felt totally unequipped.

To begin with, I was terrified of spending money I didn’t have. I didn’t believe in myself enough or believe I could pay it back.  But this was a conundrum because in order to step into the world of money- I needed to spend money to get help, go to conferences, buy plane tickets, etc. I needed to be around sucessful people, make connections, and learn from those people who knew more than I did. For awhile I made excuses. They were believable but in fact I was hiding from myself.

I realized how many decisions I made that were influenced by my values of seeing myself as small. If you want to have a bigger, more prosperous business, it doesn’t work to make decisions from a place of feeling small and scarce.

If  you can relate to any of this and you feel you are stuck with a mindset that is keeping you and your business small, you might also be ready to shift-  let loose and step into bigger leadership shoes, touch more people, and earn a higher income.

Here are are 5 things that can help you to keep your engine moving! Do all 5 of these things and you won’t stay in the same place!

1. Make decisions based on what you want, not on your old story. If your story is based on being poor, not smart, scared or whatever,  its time to write a new story!  This can be tricky because you’re attached to your old story. Its like comfy slippers. They feel good even if they are no longer supporting you.

I suggest you go on a retreat with yourself and do some real soul-searching to know what you want without the filter of your fears. Quite often we immediately see obstacles and then back away. So imagine there were no obstacles or that they could melt away and ask yourself what you want from that new story. Go somewhere inspiring and make an intention to come back with a new story.

2. Decide how much money you really want to be earning. I ask my clients this question and they usually say they  just want more.  It’s important to write down a figure because then you can create the strategy to get there.

Begin acting like someone who is earning that kind of money. Step into those boots and take your actions from that new place. Notice how your decisions are different and more expansive. When fears  come up and just acknowledge them without reacting.

3. Hang around with people who appear to be operating from that bigger mindset intention too. It’s contagious to be around people who are consciously also stepping into those bigger shoes.  Make those people your peers and the opportunities at your doorstep will appear. Then it will be a matter of you saying YES.

4. Let go of your old excuses. Although they might sound rational, they could be keeping you stuck. Old excuses are likely attached to your old story. Example:  Sometimes I avoided things that make me feel stressed.  It can sound healthy to avoid stress, however another option was to learn how to do was was needed, but in a less stressful way.

5. Face your self-worth issues. If you really don’t think you’re good enough and have something amazing to offer, then no one else will either.  You need to believe that you are already good enough the way you are. People want to be around  people who are confident and positive, so once you step into that place, you will also enjoy spending time with yourself as well!

All these above things have to do with shifting your business mind-set and changing your story and your identity.

This is the first step in my system and the way I work with entrepreneurs who want to develop a prosperous business helping people.

Which ones spoke to you?

Here is a quickie summary.

1. Change your story
2. Decide how much money you want
3. Find positive peers
4. Let go of excuses.
5. Face your self-worth issues

I want you to be successful and transform yourself and your business into being who you want to be and I know it’s these internal issues that keep you stuck. The rest is easy in comparison. You already have the skills and expertise.

Are you willing to do the work once you know the steps?

I realized I was expert at knowing how to keep myself stuck. I’ve also pushed through so I know it’s possible.

So I’m also an expert at helping women get past that stuck place and find the steps to growing a business thats bigger than they ever thought. I’d love to know what touched you about this show. I’d love to hear from you.

Be the first to add your comments

Next »

Copyright © 2014 Women Entrepreneurs Business Help

Sitemap    |    Wordpress Website Designer