How are you keeping yourself small in yourself and your business?

We’ll be looking at this question and the things that keep women stuck in a place of being smaller than they want to be.

I will be offering 5 things that you can do right now that will allow you to shift your mindset to a place where you are not just earning more money, but feeling more empowered as you re-write your own story and watch your mindset gradually transform.

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Welcome to the next episode of “Business the Wise Woman Way.”

I’m Kaya Singer and today’s topic is  ” 5 Ways to Shift to a Bigger Business Mindset”

How are you keeping yourself small?

There’s a lot of marketing hype out there about how to make six or seven figure incomes from your business and people promising you huge results overnight!

I’ve also been guilty of looking for an easy way to get there. Looking for overnight magic is not wrong or bad but for me it reflected  part of growing up with fairy tales where the princess always got saved by the prince and she never had to work.

I admit that I was raised that way- to think that I would find a husband who would support me and I wouldn’t have to work hard at anything.

That was the picture that was given to most women of my generation and it slammed right into the womens liberation messages I got later when I was in college. We were told we could be and do anything we wanted, to be independent and strong, but we weren’t given the instruction manual and the steps. No one had those steps. It had to begin with the feeling or mindset.

I still remember a group of us young women driving to a nearby city to hear Gloria Steinem speak, and on the way there we got a flat tire. None of knew how to change it or even wanted to get our hands and clothes dirty. We laughed because we were supposed to be liberated and not need men but we flagged down some nice man who looked at our cute 20 year old faces and he gladly changed the tire because he saw us as helpless girls.The prince rescuing the princesses in the forest!   We didn’t try to correct him.  it was such a confusing time.

We laughed all the way there after the tire was fixed about how how we all wanted our cake and eat it too.  I think now, 40 years later, we are all still trying to figure it out. Of course now that I am 40 years older I know that it’s fine to have my husband do those types of jobs and I manage the money! Hope you are seeing the irony.

Some women ended up with corporate jobs and felt like that they had arrived to only find out that they were looked at as fancy secretaries or at the best lower management. Men, in those days, weren’t comfortable working with them as an equal.

But I was one of those of us who chose self-employment by default. I couldn’t bear the thought of working for someone else. I wanted to be free and creative!  I thought this would be the easy way to support myself. I did just enough work to do just that.  I didn’t care about money enough to work harder.  In truth I didn’t even realize I had a business.

For one thing no one ever told me I could own a business. At that time I saw very few women as a successful business owners. And my inner mindset still wasn’t focused on money.

That changed 25 years later when I was almost 50 and realized I needed real money to do the things I wanted to do and then I got sucked into those hypey  marketing messages more than once, the ones that promised me instant wealth if I followed their system. I tried MLM thinking this was the way. I wanted a magic wand.

In fact some of those systems do work but only if you work!  I’m reminded of those old wind up toys we used to play with. It required you to turn the crank and then it would  do amazing things.

The toy comes with all the mechanisms to work. You are similar.

You have huge potential but you have to keep yourself cranked up.

First you have to recognize you have all the ability, but it requires you to slog through and face all your demons one at a time. My demons were my old money  issues,  not thinking I was smart enough,  and just not wanting to work so hard.

I had a challenging time at first, as I pushed through all of these issues in order to get to the core place that said- you have to do this and you can do this!

I had to shift my mindset at the deepest levels to realize that I was plenty smart and that in fact, it wouldn’t be overnight, I had too much “stuff’ to deal with; money issues, self-esteem, the whole enchilada. But  I knew I  could learn how to navigate the world of money. It was just a mental block that was keeping me small.

Just like recovering alcoholics are the best addiction counselors, in many ways I am now such an expert at helping women who are stuck like I was. I can recognize the signs in a moment! Maybe you have a similar story.

I kept my business small so I didn’t go over that fear line. It was small enough that I felt able to manage it. However I didn’t know that at first.  I kept saying I wanted to be bigger, 6 figures etc. but it was a lie really. I wanted the money without doing the work or facing my fears,  When I woke up and realized this is what I was doing, it was painful and it meant making decisions from a whole different place. I felt totally unequipped.

To begin with, I was terrified of spending money I didn’t have. I didn’t believe in myself enough or believe I could pay it back.  But this was a conundrum because in order to step into the world of money- I needed to spend money to get help, go to conferences, buy plane tickets, etc. I needed to be around sucessful people, make connections, and learn from those people who knew more than I did. For awhile I made excuses. They were believable but in fact I was hiding from myself.

I realized how many decisions I made that were influenced by my values of seeing myself as small. If you want to have a bigger, more prosperous business, it doesn’t work to make decisions from a place of feeling small and scarce.

If  you can relate to any of this and you feel you are stuck with a mindset that is keeping you and your business small, you might also be ready to shift-  let loose and step into bigger leadership shoes, touch more people, and earn a higher income.

Here are are 5 things that can help you to keep your engine moving! Do all 5 of these things and you won’t stay in the same place!

1. Make decisions based on what you want, not on your old story. If your story is based on being poor, not smart, scared or whatever,  its time to write a new story!  This can be tricky because you’re attached to your old story. Its like comfy slippers. They feel good even if they are no longer supporting you.

I suggest you go on a retreat with yourself and do some real soul-searching to know what you want without the filter of your fears. Quite often we immediately see obstacles and then back away. So imagine there were no obstacles or that they could melt away and ask yourself what you want from that new story. Go somewhere inspiring and make an intention to come back with a new story.

2. Decide how much money you really want to be earning. I ask my clients this question and they usually say they  just want more.  It’s important to write down a figure because then you can create the strategy to get there.

Begin acting like someone who is earning that kind of money. Step into those boots and take your actions from that new place. Notice how your decisions are different and more expansive. When fears  come up and just acknowledge them without reacting.

3. Hang around with people who appear to be operating from that bigger mindset intention too. It’s contagious to be around people who are consciously also stepping into those bigger shoes.  Make those people your peers and the opportunities at your doorstep will appear. Then it will be a matter of you saying YES.

4. Let go of your old excuses. Although they might sound rational, they could be keeping you stuck. Old excuses are likely attached to your old story. Example:  Sometimes I avoided things that make me feel stressed.  It can sound healthy to avoid stress, however another option was to learn how to do was was needed, but in a less stressful way.

5. Face your self-worth issues. If you really don’t think you’re good enough and have something amazing to offer, then no one else will either.  You need to believe that you are already good enough the way you are. People want to be around  people who are confident and positive, so once you step into that place, you will also enjoy spending time with yourself as well!

All these above things have to do with shifting your business mind-set and changing your story and your identity.

This is the first step in my system and the way I work with entrepreneurs who want to develop a prosperous business helping people.

Which ones spoke to you?

Here is a quickie summary.

1. Change your story
2. Decide how much money you want
3. Find positive peers
4. Let go of excuses.
5. Face your self-worth issues

I want you to be successful and transform yourself and your business into being who you want to be and I know it’s these internal issues that keep you stuck. The rest is easy in comparison. You already have the skills and expertise.

Are you willing to do the work once you know the steps?

I realized I was expert at knowing how to keep myself stuck. I’ve also pushed through so I know it’s possible.

So I’m also an expert at helping women get past that stuck place and find the steps to growing a business thats bigger than they ever thought. I’d love to know what touched you about this show. I’d love to hear from you.